If you die in college, do you die in real life?
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
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