Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
Randomize
