i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
false alarm, still single
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