Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Randomize
