i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
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