She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I look excited, but its just a facade.
My bed smells like the plague
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Randomize
