I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize
