she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize