If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
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