Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize
