thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
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