Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
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