I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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