Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
My liver just had a heart attack.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize