peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
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