So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize