That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
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