he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
