The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Randomize
