i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
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