I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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