I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize