just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize