What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
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Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
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I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.