Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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