Got a toothbrush?
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Your cock deserves a montage
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
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