You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize
