we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
