You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
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The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
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IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
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