Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
