Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Randomize
