Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Randomize