im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
It’s A Miracle These 21 Promiscuous People Don’t Have STDs
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
These 27 Infuriatingly Annoying Habits Will Ruin Your Day
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.