Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
