You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I intend to get homeless drunk
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
he had hair everywhere except his balls
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
