i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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