her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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