i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
me + whiskey = a bad person
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Randomize
