Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
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