Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
pray to the hookup gods
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
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