This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
