But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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