There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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