Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Randomize
