They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Randomize
