U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize