hell yes lets make some ravioli
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
Randomize
