I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
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