we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
COCAINE IS GR8
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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