How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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